Dear So and So---1 day late (plus it has been a while)

Usually on Fridays there is:




It appears this week, she may not have done it, but I need to, as I have been holding things in a lot lately.

Dear Hubby, 
you are different since those incidents a few weeks back. I KNOW that you are aware of at least some of what I am talking about. Maybe some of it you aren't (but I really do not think so) YOU NEED to make an appt. with the Doctor, and find out what is going on, as it may just be that new medicine, or it may be something more serious.  To ME, you acting like nothing is wrong, and being indifferent shows a lack of love and respect for me. What if it is something serious? Then you could be taken from me. DO what you NEED to do!
Thank you and love, Susan


Dear certain internet and blog friends,
YOU know who YOU are. You are the ones that have told me numerous times to feel free to ask questions, when I need an answer. Don't tell someone that and then time and again ignore them, when they ask a question. a few of you, have stopped even visiting my blog, I guess that is my answer--that you just can't be bothered. Well, I do not understand how it takes something away from you, to tell me what Beltaine(or Beltane) is and what should be on an alter? (one example)
How to create my own button for my blog?  that is another one. 
How to make a watermark to protect my art images?

What is the name of a certain punch you have used for a project( I even asked through your so-called contact me form for this one) and after receiving no reply I have repeatedly put it in a comment on your blog. I know you are one of the "Great ones" when it comes to card making, but if you aren't going to help others why do you mention time and again?

Do all spells and rituals NEED to be done on the full moon?

Then there are a few of you who talk SO ENTHUSIASTICALLY about an event or something that is going on with a group of people (mostly in the art world), but no new people can join. Try reading what you post from a reader's POV and not a poster's POV.

You will see that this is a form of TEASING, like "look how great and how much fun this is, wouldn't you like to be doing this?"  Things can be worded differently, as to share something you like, without getting people's juices flowing, thinking possibly they can get in on something.   Which brings me to something else.

PLEASE remove dead buttons and candy off your sidebars people, it is your blog, maintain it!

OK, getting off my soapbox now.
Thanks for listening, and don't be mad, as I am sharing with you, which is something adults should be able to do with one another.

Hugs (for the most part),
Susan

Dear son Tom,
I have it on good authority that you think you have your father snowed, and will be getting that truck for only doing one job with him or for him on this house. You are mistaken. You know we have decided to draw up a contract, which will be fully enforced, and the title stays with dad. Since we have heard about your clever bragging, and your usual manipulating behavior, Dad says he may not even give you the truck at all, he is thinking of selling it. The time as come for you to grow up. Finding convenient woman to shack up with, as all utilities and rent is already in their name...leaving you responsible for nothing is going to get around, and even your male friends eventually are going to lose respect for you. The time for lazing around, playing video games, and outside gun games(hoping to be noticed and become a paid player) is over. Put away those pipe-dreams of childhood, man-up and get a damn job! You have at least 10x over pooh-poohed jobs that would have brought you decent income. UPS for one...you wouldn't even go check it out as you don't want to get up and go to work in the morning. The cable company's call center, you have already done this kind of work, you are and can be a both a cable and a internet troubleshooter, excuse that time---"Pretty soon, we're gonna be getting big $$ for our tournaments". You really do make us feel ashamed, and questioning what we didn't do right.  Get on with an adult life already.
Love, Mom

a small artful day

Another Fairy Garden book page also for Dezinaworld's gallery contest, and an ATC for the Lottery at The Yahoo group ARTchix studies-sister site, and also for the ATC challenge blog...theme this month: Anything Goes...makes it easy :)
Hope you like :)

K & co. paper, flowers, and butterfly wings, flower along the side is raised on foam tape, Bees are copper metallic.(also K&co.)

The chipboard under her is from the book. I colored it with STAMPIN' UP markers.  The little faerie along the bottom is from a collage sheet by ALPHA STAMPS. The main Girl is from a DEZINAWORLD collage sheet.

Bkgd. paper image was a freebie from a friend, The Parrot, crown and some of the story words are from ARTchix STUDIOS, German Scrap is from COLLAGE STUFF, vellum flower and "q" rec'd as a rak, I colored the flower, Plastic stars from an old child's bracelet I have in my junk pile.

Happy Mother's day to all...

Moms, soon-to-be-Moms, almost-like-a-Mom, Want-to-be-Moms, and Moms-to-fur babies!!!

My Dad is gone, but I am BLESSED to still have my Mom alive and doing pretty well. She is 84, has some heart issues, some thyroid and BP issues, bad arthritis, and a bit of scoliosis. We had a few scares, the chest pains that sent her to the Hospital in the summer of 2001(right after Ron had his 2 heart attacks, and double bypass surgery...in fact he was still in the hosp. when we got the call)  Mom did NOT have a heart attack, but tests showed that even though her heart muscle was that of a "30 year old" her coronary arteries were that of an "80 year old"  she had 5 bypasses, followed by infection in one of her leg incisions (where they grafted a vein from), and also followed by her passing out cause she was sent home on 2 BP meds and it lowered her BP too much (that's FL. medical care for you)  2 years later she a a polyp removed from her colon with pre-cancerous cells, they removed about a foot of bowel to protect her.  1 year later she went in for hernia repair and the doctor perforated her bowel, causing Peritonitis. (FL medical...she had a case for Malpractice, but didn't want to go through with it---I called Risk management and bitched as the doctor even told my mother she "was leaving for vacation right after mom's surgery"  {can you say RUSH?} ) As far as I know they never billed my mom's supplemental insurance or her for anything during that hospital stay. (the least they could do) It was after this that they moved back home to NJ near my sister, as my Dad pleaded with her, and wept, saying he was so scared when Mom was in the hospital, and there was no one down there for them. (we did try to tell them this before they moved)

ANYWAY...I am Blessed that she is still with us, and I do not get to see her nearly enough.
She is spending today with my sister and BIL. I send her - her card a small part of her gift in the mail. she called today to say how much she LOVED my card, and planned to save it as she did last year's. We'll be going up in a week or so.

I HOPE all of you have a wonderful day doing something you enjoy, with people you enjoy and love :)

I will be spending the day, clipping our grand dog, hubby will be in charge of the bath since I can't kneel, but I'll help. I'll be going into wally world for a couple of things, and Michael's to look for a particular MS edge punch LOL. Then hubs and I are going out to dinner nothing fancy.  The 3 places on the list are: Old Country buffet, Golden Corral, and Ruby Tuesdays (love their salad bar)

Here is the card I made for my Mom, Lenora(always called Lynn)

 this one is a bit blurry sorry

 Ahh, much better. 

Products used: STAMPIN' UP card stock Chocolate Chip, GEORGIA PACIFIC White card stock,

both printed papers are from PRIMA'S -Sparkling Spring 6 x 6 pad, SPELLBINDERS nestabilities die Labels 16, MARTHA STEWART double edge punch-"Doily Lace Trim", PRIMA flowers--Fairytale Roses-Orchid pack, STAMPIN' UP markers, Christmas red STICKLES, Diamond Glaze (on Mirror), Misc: Thread to sew the flower together, a heart shaped pink button, foam tape to elevate the image on top of another printing of that image, redline tape(powdered in between the petals), and a bit of glue to attach my flower.

Stamps: Digital stamp, "Momma's Hat" by MCMAHON 5 DESIGNS (bought especially for mom's card) sentiment--HAMPTON ART, designed by Elizabeth Wong. I also used the swirls and birds for the inside of the card

 close up of the 3D flower I made using a edge punch

 a better view, plus you can see all the other 3D

 a different view

 close up of the digi stamp, prima roses etc.

The inside, I thought about taking the picture too late, I had already written in it, but decided to anyway. The border punch you see here is the same used to make the flower, except once I attached the 2 strips (11") together, I cut it in half lengthwise, so it would have a flat bottom and sit on the card better.

a quick revist of some steam punk-#3

These photos are here individually, but were originally in groups. but they have been asked to be uploaded into a Gallery for a contest. so I have to put them up again. wish me luck :) it has to be 3 separate posts.


All are ATCs

 Mystere Elements

a quick revist of some steam punk-#2

These photos are here individually, but were originally in groups. but they have been asked to be uploaded into a Gallery for a contest. so I have to put them up again. wish me luck :) it has to be 3 separate posts.


All are ATCs

 Believe Miracles

a quick revist of some steam punk-#1

These photos are here individually, but were originally in groups. but they have been asked to be uploaded into a Gallery for a contest. so I have to put them up again. wish me luck :) it has to be 3 separate posts.

All are ATCs and I apologize for this being so grainy, not sure what happened.

 Enchanting Illusion

Marvelous what a Mucha Mojito and a Vicodin will do...LOL (art too)

Seriously, tonight was a good night. the day was yuk, and I never thought I would make it to tonight but I did.
It has been very muggy here for the past 3 days, which is not good for my asthma. The A/C units are not in the windows yet. I was really hoping we could afford to have "through-the-wall-units" put in before this summer, HA!  I am a bit concerned though, because I have boxes and boxes of BRAND NEW envelopes out in the "POD". They will start sticking together. Anyway, the knee was painful today...the dampness?  just the knee's lack of cartilage? who knows, but the pain was bound to come back. As usual it is much worse after taking a shower, and My daughter and her boyfriend were coming down to go out to dinner with us. 

So Shower I did, AND she agreed she would help me with a project upstairs. My intention was to go up and come down only. so right before she got here I took a Vicodin, and it hadn't even kicked in by the time I went up the stairs, it was just starting by the time we came down.  We all went out to Applebee's in her new leased Nissan (royal blue-so petty) It was a "meet-the-new-BF" and a "celebration" dinner as she was given her own "Journey's" Shoe store to manage. She's only been with the company for about 7 months. Yes I really want her to go to college, but this is still a proud moment, in this economy for her to be moving up is a good thing. I had a "Mucha Mojito"  so therefore, I was in a good mood and not feeling the knee until I stood up and walked out of the restaurant.

Not to shadow her older sister, though she isn't a real part of my life right now, She is graduating from College, next Saturday(Ron and I are attending). I am very proud. Even though there have been issues causing much friction between us, most of the issues are her own, and she has had several rough years, so to me this is marvelous. The end of May she goes down for her interview and final steps before total acceptance into graduate school in Ft. Lauderdale, Fl. (Nova Southeastern University--same school my own niece went to). If the total acceptance goes through, she'll be starting classes down there the end of August.

I have no clue what is going on with my son, as so far he hasn't even kept his promise to his Dad to stay in touch to set up work times for the house, and the weather has been great for getting work done, shame. Also, since son isn't here to help, hubby is NOT pushing himself.


OK art time.

I am in a swap for a "Fairy Garden book" it is a chipboard book made by Maya Rd. (so cool) the front page is cut and the whole book is shaped like a picket garden gate. We are to make and swap 4 of the solid pages. I am in the midsts of making a few of these, so at least 2 can go in my Etsy shop, which I am feverishly working on inventory for.

2 of the pages are roughly the same, because I actually made 4-1 for me, 1 for a friend(Lynn) and 2 to swap, and then the other 2 are different.

 The "Rain Faerie" pages...Poem by me, piece of aqua crocheted doily, Bkgd. paper old pink and white roses paper by Provocraft, sprayed with aqua radiant rain. Diamond glaze used on her bubble. Copper, flat and 3D items all by K & co. Alphabet letters by Provo craft

 The backs are also old provo craft paper, flat, 3D and acetate items by K & co.

 The  short poem:

she rises from the deep blue

to bring the scent of the fresh

clean sea to you.

She rides atop a wet, shiny bubble

washing away all trouble.

gliding just above the ground,

she traverses the earth all around.

She brings all the dew and the rains

to the trees, grasses, flowers, and grains.

Proud member of the family of Fae,

she is an Earth Guardian.

~S, Guzy©2011

 ALL fairies from Alpha Stamps collage sheets

"Spring brings Blessings of Renewal"

Bkgd. paper by Pink Paislee (Butterfly garden set), leaf ribbon and brass bee from Alpha Stamps, all flat, 3D and copper items from K & co. Marvy Calligraphy pen. stickles (you can't see them for some reason)

 The back...bkgd. paper from K & co. and provo craft. Butterfly, 3D fern and vellum flowers by K & co.

 Bkgd. paper by K &co. vine stamp by Alpha stamps, Flower soft, and diamond glaze used on and around pond. brass dragonfly by Alpha stamps, 3D bird by K&co. red iridescent flowers by Skybluepink. "Once upon a time" by Crafty Secrets. Black German scrap by ARTchix. stickles (you can't see them for some reason)

The back. Bkgd. paper by 7 gypsies, fern by K & co. 3D moth by Pink Paislee, bird and nest from my own collection of images

a bit of ART and update on Hubs, me etc

These are for a SPRING ATC swap (on one of my Fav. Yahoo groups--TheSumofAllATCs)...it is a 4/4 swap, I started out with 7, 4 for the swap, one for the hostess, one for me, and one for a friend, but I found myself making more (The hostess said I could send 2 sets)...LOL and I am still having ideas for more.

I will give some info on products used but I am not making it my mission.

I have lots to do, and Hubby still isn't quite himself, BUT we remembered he is on a new med...he was switched from zoloft to cymbalta, and started on 30mg, then he gets bumped up to 60mg (once a day at bedtime) We both think this may be where the fatigue is coming from, but it really doesn't explain the 2 incidents of nonsensical speech, or the recent issues with short term memory. HOWEVER, as hubby put it, both times of speech issues he was tired and doing the head bob in front of the TV, so who knows perhaps it is from the meds. 

Yet, it doesn't explain how he started up the stove and frying pan, and not remembering what he was going to cook, when I told him eggs, he said "yea, but what else- anything else?" That was tonight. Four nights ago, it was a commercial, he was done eating, I was still eating and both cats came in the LR from eating in the Kitchen, if we do not pick up their bowls the dog will finish off their food...so I asked him to go pick up the cat bowls, and bring something back for me.  He got up, went into the kitchen, and I heard him say to himself, "what did I come in here for?" then he said; "oh, yea."  He brought me what i asked for but a little while later I went in the kitchen and both cat's bowls were still on the floor and both had been cleaned out by the dog.  

I am going to count the pills tomorrow, so we can see how many days he's been on the new pills, if it is longer than 2 weeks I am going to call the pharmacist and ask his opinion. We may have to call the doc on Monday, we'll see.

:::KNOCKING ON WOOD:::  For some reason, the last week or so, I have only had 2 bad days with my knee!! Thank the stars! The wrist has been bad though, and I have had fatigue, AND the Maple trees are starting with their buds, which means soon everything will be covered in yellow. The allergy attacks are starting already.  I have year round allergies, and deal with it year round, but of course certain times of the year are MUCH WORSE.  I have been going outside a little bit each day, walking to the mailbox and back, playing with the dog, and even starting small on spring yard clean up.  SADLY, I did NOT get to do my house cleansing ritual this past full moon again, Sunday was way too windy to have candles lit outside, Monday night hubby was falling asleep. If I didn't need help getting around (uneven ground) the house I wouldn't care. So I am aiming for May's Full moon.  I do have a question for any of my experienced witchy friends (you can email if you do not want to post here)  How do I  hold a smudge, shell, fan, and my incantation with only 2 hands, not to mention waving the smoke with the feather fan, and collecting the ashes with the shell?

Ok...on with the art>>> these were all scanned, so the 3D items made the lighting off, sometimes the colors are off a bit also, sorry

 above one for the swap, one for a friend (what appears more reddish, is actually more pinkish) A & B

 Both of the above I am keeping C & D

 both above for the swap E & F

 Both the above are for swap, of which the hostess can choose one for herself. G & H

 Both for the swap. I & J

Both for the swap. K & L

B,D,E & H all the same bkgd. paper- very old Pink(a very shades of) and White roses by Provocraft. I spritzed it with blue lagoon Radiant Rain.

A,C,F &G all the same Bkgd. paper also very old Provo craft.

I,J,K, & L all use paper from "Once  upon a springtime" by Graphic 45 or from Pink Paislee's "Butterfly Garden"

Images: 

A-- Once upon a springtime paper, B-- 7Gypies's Conservatory paper pad + misc. vellum quote that I ripped into pieces and the aco-friendly image from magazine

C-- "once upon a springtime" from it's pad, "reflection" from a Curious by Design collage sheet, all others from ARTchix collage sheets, D-- all images from ARTchix, misc flower and brad

E-- Post mark and Tag from the punch out sheet "Once upon a springtime" by Graphic 45, quote and small butterflies image by ARTchix, F--all images from "Once upon a spring time" -Graphic 45, words from old children's book, Prima mini flowers

G--Tag and post mark-"Once upon a spring time" punch out sheet by Graphic 45, words from old children's book, butterfly from ARTchix and  the insect band image from  "Vintage Post Card Fairies"collage sheet by AlphaStamps, H-- Feather and the "13" block is from 7 Gypsies' conservatory paper pad, the postmark is from "Once upon a spring time" punch out by Graphic 45, words from ARTchix, misc. flower and brad

I-- Bkgd. and corner papers-"Once upon a springtime" by Graphic 45, 3D leaf and butterfly by K & co.

german scrap daisy by Alpha Stamps, J-- Floral paper from OUAS by Graphic 45, bottom striped and floral paper from Pink Paislee's Butterfly Garden paper pad, Framed bird from 7 Gypsies' Conservatory paper pad, Ranger "Rock Candy" crackle paint, german scrap daisy by Alpha Stamps

K-- paper from OUAS by Graphic 45, german scrap daisy by Alpha Stamps, all images; flat and 3D by 

K & co., L-- Bkgd. paper OUAS by Graphic 45, along with the bkgd. paper behind the rectangular floral image; that image I BELIEVE is from ARTchix (raised on foam tape) flowers misc. mini color glazed roses

All German scrap borders from either ARTchix or Collage Stuff.  Also used, Diamond glaze and Gold paint pen. all comments welcome.

Ok...BACK to the 30 days of truth...

Please see that page :) it is day 9, you'll need to scroll down, if you choose to leave a comment, start your comment with  "Comment for day 9" as the page is set up with only one comment section, I do not know how to get it to allow separate posts and separate comments .
Thanks, Susan

Am I a villain?

I was just over at Witchy Godmother's


it was story day. The story touched on something I think about OFTEN.


Here is exactly what I posted to the comment section:

"I seem to spread it(gloom and depression-edit to add in case you do not want to read her story) just by sharing what is going on in my daily life. It has caused me to kind of not post to FB or to my blog much. There is nothing NEW or GOOD in my life right now to share. it has been a ridiculously bad winter for us (if you have been to my blog at all) and that is on top of my normal crappy life.

I know it is hard to not tell people the sad and bad, but if you have nothing else, how do you have conversations? how do you post, how do you reach out? This story is good, but unfortunately it made me feel like I am a villain and I am really not."


Then I told her I was just sharing, and that the story gave me pause.


It does give me pause. I noticed like 2 weeks ago or so I was up to 222 followers, and a couple of days later it was back to 221 (which it had been for a while)yesterday it was at 218. It seems to be 3 of my newer followers one older.  Did I do that? Do I scare people away, because I talk about my  health issues, physical short-comings (due to injuries), depression & anxiety, or family troubles? Am I the spreader of gloom and depression?....A VILLAIN? I try so hard not to be.

I have numerous times said I was not going to allow my Oldest daughter near me again, as she ALWAYS, and I mean always starts out nice (it is almost like a trap) and then once again starts to rip me up one side and down the other....Well she called a week or so ago to tell me that her graduation from college is May 7, she had already informed me of the milestone, but didn't know the date. She told me she only had 6 tickets. she has 2 sets of parents, and 2 grandmothers (though she has many times told me, and others that MY mother is not her grandmother because Nana (and Pop-pop) moved to Florida for 11 years of her life, and therefore was a stranger) she said, "well I only have two to offer this side of my family". I said ok. I basically thought it was hands-down Ron and I. (her MAIN set of parents, I had Custody) then she went on to tell me she invited her brother. I said ok then, ask your sister and that will be the 2 tickets I was in a good mood, i didn't let this get to me, though I would think parents would gets dibs before siblings. She got highly agitated and said "Why do you always have to bring up Amanda?"  I said well it makes logical sense that since you already invited the one sibling from this family, you would invite the other. "No, mother, and you know I am do not have any%$#@& thing to do with her." I said well, I am having nothing to do with your brother since he threatened my life. "Oh he did not, your exaggerating." I said plus he is in  Philly, are you going to pick him up? she had no answer. I said ok, what about Ron and I? she hesitated with an aaaaa. I said nevermind, have Tom get transportation here, and then you can donate your ticket to another family or your sister from your Dad's family can bring her boyfriend. She let out a long string of expletives and was overall nasty, so I hung up a week later she decided to call me being all sweetness and sunshine again, and now it was, "mom, you come, and I'll donate the other ticket."  I told her I wouldn't go without Ron or Amanda, as sometimes I can not drive due to taking a vicodin, and nor did I want to go by myself.  She let out a heavy sigh, and then said "You are impossible."  How was I being impossible?
she informed me she had to go. 2 days later I get a call from my ex-husband telling me, if I need a ride, I can go with them. Like I was going to do that. then she got made at me, telling me that I always had to abandon her and put my needs first because i would rather not go, then be in the vehicle with my ex, his wife and his mother and be stuck with them longer as they were going out to dinner etc. That Man used to beat  and choke me, he choked me with one hand while holding her on his hip with his other arm when she was about 22 months old. His mother KNEW all along he was violent, as her husband was and never warned me. There is more to the x and daughter scene then I wish to discuss right now. There was just no way. Ok 3 nights ago, she shows up here with the 2 tickets and a map of the campus. "I guess you can come with Ron", she proclaimed...bet that made him feel good. I didn't say a word, Ron and I just looked at each other, she ended up , eating some of our dinner and hung out for a while, which was nice, and I completely stayed pleasant throughout the 2 weeks.

2night ago she spots me on FB, and starts a chat, hi,  hi etc small talk. then she quickly turned it to the same old crap she keeps dredging up from the past. This has been my stand for almost 4 years now... #1, we all have some issues with our parents, we all have some baggage, #2 what is in the past is in the past, it is done and over with, #3 it can not be changed, #4 agree to disagree and start fresh. SHE KNOWS that is my stand, my terms, whatever. (even her own cousins older and wiser than she, have tried to tell her #1-3, the one cousin, a wise woman, an attorney told her, 1-3 AND "you accept your parents for who they are, or you don't and cut all ties, it is up to you"  NO< not my April, she just has to keep digging at crap.
well after almost 2 hours of her chewing me up. I got off FB, but not before copying and pasting the entire conversation.  I have FOLDERS of crap from my daughter. I did not tell Ron any of it, as I want the dust to settle, but we may not be going to her graduation. we went to see my mom today, I didn't tell her anything about it, why upset her.  But she knows about the graduation, and she knows what April's plan is to get her masters at LEAST and be a family counselor...which is basically a joke among most of the family, as we all think she needs help, so how could she possibly help others?

MY POINT is any other mother would be crushed by the possibility of not being able to celebrate such a milestone with her child.  I am learning how to start keeping the negative away, even if as April said to me the other night "have fun dying alone." so even if I end up alone (I am basically there right now anyway) isn't it better to keep out as much negativity as possible, and try to bring myself back to the upbeat person I used to be?  I do NOT want to be the villain, the spreader of gloom and depression!!